Friend.

Why do I care?

It’s not something special anyway.

That’s what I thought in the beginning.

But I’m weeping now.

It’s tiring just thinking about it.

I don’t know why it bothers me,

So much.

I hate the fact that,

Things are not going as how I planned.

Hangouts and deep conversations,

It didn’t last long.

Actually it was rare between us.

Most of the time you just stay silent and kept quiet.

I guess god has better plannings for me and you.

Maybe I’ve wronged you too much,

And maybe I’m not the best fit for your future.

I know people come and go,

But you going out from my life is just heartbreaking.

And actually amusing in the same time.

It’s amusing how trust that is build for years can disappear within days.

You didn’t even confront me,

Yet you have made the decision to kick me out.

And it’s amazing that someone who broke my heart is still here in my head.

It’s amazing that I still care about you.

But the most sad thing,

Is that I’m scared to even say hi after confronting you.

Because you didn’t even smile,

And you didn’t even look.

Knowing and seeing the truth is such a pain.

Sometimes I hoped that I was as mean and strong as you…

To just move on and ignore the people I “think” doesn’t care about me.

Also leave them clueless.

The last thing I gave you,

Was a sincere letter for your birthday.

I hope you don’t think it’s fake.

Because if you do,

It really proves that all these years of friendship,

You never knew me.

Don’t take my sincerity for granted.

I hope you are doing well and happy with your new supportive friends.

And I hope your mind is more clear now.

I never had any grudges for you,

And I’ve never felt like cutting you off.

It’s good knowing you,

Friend.